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I’ve been mulling about home made sex toys when I stumbled upon this site. They have seriously funny stuff about how to use ordinary household items for sex. Some of the best ones involve a microwave-cooked melon, three balloons filled with hot water and three bar stools positioned to form a triangle (what?!?). Yep, it’s something straight out of a bad American Pie parody, but who knows, some of us might actually spurt their jizms using those techniques.

Personally, I would buy a sex kit if it contained several nifty things to use on my girl. Never mind that there’s a good, trusty eggplant sitting unused (and uneaten) inside my refrigerator, I wouldn’t think of sticking a home made sex toy inside my girl’s pussy, not only because it’s unsanitary, but also because it could break; or splinter; or get mashed. I won’t even try to think of the reactions of the ER staff when they struggle to get that thing out of her.

Quality sex toys are the way to go. Pick the ones that are most comfortable, spend extra on hypoallergenic stuff. It’s trouble enough to get her to cum, and the last thing that I need is to worry about things that could traumatize enough to forget about sex with me completely.

But they’re expensive!

A sex toy is a luxury item that you have to make room for in your budget. A set of anal beads could spell the difference between a good orgasm and a great one. How to do this? Insert the beads in her anus and yank it gently out while she’s cumming. You can do this while you’re going down on her.

Tongue dildos are all the rage right now because there are new innovations that make it possible to bring and use a tongue dildo wherever a woman goes. Unlike the typical vibrator, which is bulky, noisy (buzzy) and embarrassing to carry around, the tongue dildo can be shaped like a tube of lipstick or a compact. It doesn’t need to be long because a really, really long tongue is unrealistic, and a woman would want to feel the tongue texture on her external sensitive areas anyway.

The upper part of the tongue dildo is soft and pliable, much like a human tongue. When it is turned on, the vibrations that start at the more solid base make the “tongue” part shiver and move around. There’s usually no buzz when a woman uses a tongue dildo so she can use it anywhere, even when she’s sitting beside someone else.

How a Tongue Dildo Can Help a Man’s Oral Sex Technique

He can simply ask her to use it in front of him. He can observe how the woman moves the tongue part around her clit, labia and vaginal opening. She might even play with her anus using her tongue dildo and you’ll know what that means right? She likes to be rimmed! Pay close attention to how long she stays on a particular spot and whether she keeps the dildo steady or she moves it over the area like a paint brush. Remember that as a spectator, you aren’t allowed to touch, but you can turn her on more by talking dirty.

Observe, learn, apply; then wash, rinse, repeat.

Acknowledging that failure to orgasm in the woman is also a man’s problem, is the first step to getting full sexual gratification in both partners. There are two elements in a sexual exchange that are keys to making everything work, and these are: technique and timing.

Technique

A guy who has the proper technique will know when to change positions, and when to keep going. He will also learn how to read a woman’s body language so that he will go exactly where she wants him to go, even when she’s too incoherent to express her wishes explicitly.

• Observe where she touches herself as you are fondling or kissing her. Did you see her hands massage her breasts? Did you feel her rub her hips against your thighs. Sometimes a woman’s body can tell you what she craves for even without her talking to you about it. Also, note how she holds on to your head while you kiss her lips or her breasts, is she pushing down or is she keeping you steady?
• Unless she asks for it, do not bite. The nipples and the clitoris are extremely sensitive and she might not be screaming in pleasure when you bite her sensitive spots. Resist the urge to bite. The rule of thumb is to simply lick and suck the sensitive areas continuously, without biting.

Timing

• There are a lot of ways to gauge your girlfriends mood, and one of these is counting. Some days during the month are better than the others, and any girl will tell you that her off days bring cramps and black moods.

What does sex without orgasm feel like?

Frustrating.

Exasperating.

Much like…

• Being in line for the premier showing of the latest Starwars movie for 12 hours only to realize that you have left the movie ticket at home, just when you were about to enter the movie house.
• Having your internet connection cut in the middle of the night after a week of waiting for your friends to show up and join you on a World of Warcraft raid. You call customer support and offer to pay the bill through Paypal right there and then but no go. “Please visit the main office from 8 am to 5 pm tomorrow.”
• The electricity shuts down while you’re watching the last round of the year’s greatest boxing event. You call the electric company and they tell you that your electricity will come back after two hours.

I posed this question to some friends during chill out time.

Imagine being tied to a tree, but continuously kissed and teased by a hundred beautiful women living wild in the Amazon Basin. They tease you until you’re almost cumming then they stop completely. The condition is that, if they let you cum, you will have to hunt the biggest croc in their jungle with your bare hands. But if you just let them continue teasing and fondling you without letting you orgasm, you will remain tied to the tree, ungratified but safe from certain death. ”

You won’t believe how many of my pals chose the croc. But one smart ass answered:

“Dude, I’ll mentally condition myself to orgasm as soon as someone touches my dong, no matter how slight the touch.”

A part of the faking process is the thought that occurs to some women while they’re having sex:

Let’s get it over with.

Guys love to hear a woman cumming, in fact he takes it for granted that when he cums, she was also able to cum in the process. In the past, we discussed why women can’t cum during sex (they want to but can’t); now, we will discuss why women won’t cum during sex (they don’t want to even try). This issue came up in a conversation with a few friends. One guy confessed that he doesn’t wait for the woman to cum, or doesn’t put effort in making her.

“Her orgasm, her responsibility”

Men who have this way of thinking are like pirates on board a crew ship that they hold hostage. They come in guns ablaze, pilfer what they can and run. The sad truth is that a lot of women deal with it quietly, like it’s just the way it is. Some women do not put effort into their orgasm because

• They don’t know how to start building pressure or libido to be able to cum

• Their men don’t care if they cum or not; or just “assume” that her orgasm will be as spontaneous as his

• “What’s an orgasm?”

• “I let him just pound away hoping I’d cum too, but I don’t. Orgasms are for men, foreplay is for girls.”

• “I have never felt the need for one because sex without it feels good anyway”

Women are entitled to their orgasms. And, the men should be considerate enough to give it to them. Regardless of how many more expensive material things he could have given her, an orgasm will still be the best gift he can give her, particularly if she can’t do it on her own.

The common problem among women who want to orgasm but can’t is vaginal soreness. Sure there are lubes all over the place to aid you in the event that the vaginal juices dry up, but from experience, I know how it’s impossible to keep going at it when the woman is dry. It becomes painful for the guy and even more so for the girl. When this happens, you just drop everything for the moment and stop all sexual activity. Yes, I said stop.

But she still hasn’t cum!

• If she tells you her vagina feels sore, she’s probably thinking by then “this orgasm better be worth all this pain.”
• A guy can opt to revert back to foreplay or give her unhurried and relaxing bodily massage that will take her mind off her sore pussy.
• If you opt to stop, let her go to the bathroom and clean her sore vagina with warm water for a few minutes. Then, when she comes back you can start over.

The harder it is for her to concentrate on pleasure because of the soreness, the more you can’t make her cum. If you persist, she might end up faking just so you’d stop. The devil’s advocate says: Maybe she came already and you just didn’t notice. If you simply couldn’t tell if she had an orgasm already, you can ask her directly. It’s the sensitive thing to do. But the real question is this:

Are women entitled to cum during sex?

If you have not paid much attention to the visual appeal of your girlfriend’s pussy (like when you do it in the dark), here’s a short description. The clitoris is the very sensitive pink skin located just above your girlfriend’s vagina. If you explore her pubic region and observe the texture of the skin around and within her vaginal region, you will notice that part of her vagina that feels hard to the touch, but not as hard as a man’s penis during full arousal.

There’s a structure around the clitoris that other sources called ‘clitoral hood’. The physiological function of this structure is to provide protection to the overly sensitive clitoris. When a girl is merely sitting down and wearing tight jeans, the constant rubbing of her clitoris on her underwear fabric may be painful if the clitoral hood was not present.

Why do men need to know about these structures? These ‘clitoral cohorts’ can be licked and teased instead of the pink clitoris for more intense oral sex pleasure for the girl. The skin folds surrounding the clitoris are extremely thin, and kissing and licking these is sometimes preferable to direct clitoral stimulation.

Women differ, and there are some who just won’t be able to take direct clitoral touching because it’s more painful than pleasurable. If you meet a girl like this, it’s probably better to concentrate on the skin folds around her clitoris than on the clitoris per se. Make sure you use the ‘soft tongue’ first to gauge just how sensitive she is down there, before going wild with the ‘hard tongue’.

Foreplay is the time for you to explore and experiment with sexual techniques. It is also the time to encourage your girl to tell you where she wants to be touched and how she wants to be fondled. Some want you to be rough, while others want a more gentle approach.

Fingering is an art. A lot of women love being fingered, but not if you don’t know how. There are men who shove rather than ‘enter gently’, which can be painful. Also, some men don’t gauge the wetness of the girl before diving right in with their fingers. A woman needs to be wet to feel pleasure. In case she doesn’t get wet easily, though, a guy can start with her breasts and refrain from touching her down there while she’s not gushing yet.

How to Finger A Girl: The Thumbing Technique

One girl mentioned how she gets desensitized when a guy simply inserts two fingers in at the onset. When this happens, it’s time to switch fingering techniques and use your thumb. The thumb doesn’t get used much to provide fingering pleasure because it’s short and stubby.

Here’s a trick I learned: when she’s really wet, touch her vagina using the flat side of your thumb until you get to the clitoris. Wet your thumb with her juices and rub the clitoris gently with it. Use your forefinger and middle finger to enter her gently, but don’t focus too much on their movements. The main thing you should concentrate on is the way your thumb moves over her clit; in circles, pressing downwards or upwards, or rubbing sideways.