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It’s actually very easy to increase your sexual intelligence quotient. You start by correcting the mistakes that you have been making. What are those mistakes? And how do you remedy them? Let’s take a look.

The first mistake coincides with the male mentality that sex is a sprint to cross the orgasmic finish line. The faster you are able to get a partner to climax is not the most enjoyable way to have sex. The foreplay, on the other hand, can be an immeasurably exciting and fun experience. A partner can become so “hot” during extended foreplay that the resulting climax proves even better than when you race to the finish. You should think of sex as a marathon… not a sprint.

Try this: tease your partner by gently kissing, flicking your tongue on her skin. Kiss her all over for a long time… until she simply cannot take it anymore… until she screams in desire for you to come inside of her.

The second mistake has to do with always having sex at the same time, in the same place. How boring! No wonder your sex life is dull. It’s time to inject a sense of adventure into your life. Be creative and be spontaneous. Think of all the other places you can engage your partner in lovemaking. There’s the garage, your car, outside. Find your own nook. I suggest being discreet, however.

More of a Bore

The third mistake people make is unimaginative foreplay. More of a bore! I spoke recently with an online friend who touted the benefits of physical exercise as foreplay. Imagine that! A couple works out together, they work up a sweat. They shower together, they make love together. Wow! My friend tells me that a man’s sweat has something called androstadienone in it. This is some sort of testosterone derivative that is said to increase a woman’s sexual desire when she smells it. Who knew!

The fourth mistake lovers make is to begin the joy of lovemaking the same way all the time. Again, be creative and try something new. For instance, have you ever thought to tie your partner’s hands up and make them figure out how to take off your clothes? Interesting, huh? This activity will take your relationship to a higher level. You are friends, first and foremost. So live, love and laugh … a lot!

The fifth mistake that mostly men make is to delay sex until after his TV shows are over. Television will make you lazy and then you will fall into the sex traps that we are trying to avoid here. Instead of watching the boob tube, read a book to your lady. She loves to hear your voice, and the lower your voice, the better off you are. You see, if you read lying in bed with your head up, you will force your sound waves down an octave. This happens because you use your diaphragm instead of your lungs to push out your breath. Low voices coincide with testosterone and your lady can’t get enough of your manliness.

The sixth and final mistake we will mention here is the bad habit of holding hands excessively. Don’t get me wrong … holding hands is great. It’s is sensual to feel the soft skin of your partner’s hand. It shows a connection two people have. But too much of it just defeats the purpose. Instead, touch other parts of her body. The nape of a woman’s neck is a very sexy, sensitive area. Caress her there, softly kiss her there. She will get excited … trust me. I know.

Whether you are guilty of none, one or all of the above mistakes, everyone can benefit from variety in their sex life. Learning how to correct the mistakes that you or others have made will surely up your sexual IQ. Don’t you want to be sexy and smart?

Do you long to be a great lover? If so, then you need to know her body extremely well.  You see, if you do, then you’ll know all her ‘hot buttons’ and exactly when and how to make full use of them.

For us men, it’s our members and prostate glands that are the keys to sexual nirvana. Women also have two main important sexual triggers: the clitoris and the g-spot.

Most of us men probably already know how to stimulate the clitoris but their G-spots? They’re not called mysterious spots for nothing! Truth be told, few men even know where the g-spot is. But this is for sure: if you know where it is, lucky you, because inducing gspot orgasms is one sure-fire way to getting yourself declared a great lover.

How to Find the G-spot

The g-spot, or the Grafenberg Spot, is situated behind her pubic bone, up with the front walls of her vagina. It actually feels a bit rough, like the upper wall of your mouth, and is situated along the urethra (the passageway through which she urinates). As for exact measurements and location though, there are none because each woman is different.

As a guide, consider this: her navel is at the 12 o’clock position. Her gspot is somewhere from 11 to 1 o’clock. If she’s aroused, the gspot will be slightly engorged. If not, you need to feel around for that slightly rough ridge!

Found the G-Spot… Now What?

Mind-blowing gspot climaxes are often set off by brief but continuous friction. One of the best ways to achieve this is when you engage in doggy-style sex. This is because your penis is angled in such a way that it steadily ‘hits’ the gspot.

Master this sexual position and gspot stimulation technique and your woman will not know what hit her. Gone are the days when she would ‘fake it’ so as not to hurt your feelings (or because she just wants to stop already!). On the contrary, she’ll be staring at you as if you’re some Adonis or something.

However, if, for some reason, you can’t stimulate her gspot with this sexual position, don’t worry. There’s always your index finger.

As mentioned above, the g-spot becomes slightly engorged when she’s aroused. In fact, it can puff up to the size of about a large quarter. Don’t take my word for it though as all women are different! Still, this should make it easier for your finger to distinguish the gspot inside her; and from there on, she’s all yours!

Now, when she’s really turned on, be warned that she may complain that she needs to ‘pee’. This is a normal reaction especially if this is her first time to reach a gspot climax. When she does come, her ejaculation will probably look different than her normal come, which in turn may convince her (and you) that she did pee. She didn’t; or even of she did it’s not a much as she thought; believe me most of that is due to her ‘cumming’ so wildly.

Spot It the Best Way you Know How

There are several things you can try to find her mega pleasure nub.

• Ask your partner to lie down, legs slightly apart and place a pillow beneath her buttocks to elevate her groin.

• Gently but firmly put in two fingers (palm up) insider her and then gently explore her vaginal wall. You’re looking for a slightly puffed up, ridged surface. Be sure to pay attention to her face and reactions to see if you’re causing pleasure or pain. As you get nearer her gspot, you’ll notice that she’s moving her body a bit to guide you.

• Use your other hand and put your palm on her abdomen, applying a bit of pressure. This pressure will help you stimulate the g-spot from the inside further.

By now, she should be grinding the sheets beneath her from pleasure, quickly assume any of the positions suggested below.

The Best Positions for G-Spot Orgasms

Position #1. Doggy-style.

Guide her until she’s on all fours, with her behind slightly elevated towards you. Get behind her and slowly penetrate from behind. As you thrust, try to remember where her g-spot is and try to reach it with the tip of your penis. After a few, steady aims don’t be surprised if she starts screaming as waves of pleasure hit her.

Position #2. The Butterfly.

Ask your partner to lie down, and then place a pillow beneath her buttocks to elevate her groin. Assume the missionary position, and then gently guide her knees to he breasts. As in position #1, aim to hit her gspot as you thrust in and out.

Position #3. Woman-on-Top with a Twist.

Lie down and give your woman ample access to your ’sword’. However, instead of facing you, ask her to face your outstretched legs instead. (A great bonus for you is that you get to see her sexy behind.) This position is absolutely great for hitting her g-spot. One thing to keep in mind though, as she reaches her wild orgasm, ensure that you can control her movements a bit so she doesn’t end up snapping your penis!

There you have it; all you need to know to bring her to a glorious g-spot orgasm.

Use the above tips wisely and be prepared for a climax that will surely hit her wildly.

Food isn’t just for the kitchen anymore. A lot of people are taking some of it into the bedroom, and not to eat while they watch TV, either. Food can be a very erotic substance when used correctly. If you’ve ever shared a glass of wine and a fruit and cheese platter with your lover on a romantic weekend, before going to bed, you’re on the right track. You can do more with food, though, if you feel like being just a little more adventurous. One of the best ways to use food in the bedroom is to take something sweet like a slice of melon and run it along your partner’s body. Then follow that trail with your tongue. It will taste sweet to you, and your partner will enjoy the attention, too. You can also use whipped cream, chocolate syrup, and other similar substances on erogenous zones.

Be careful not to get sweet substances like whipped cream actually inside the vagina, however. There is a delicate balance there which could lead to infection if disturbed by too much sugar. Other than that, though, the sky is mostly the limit with food in the bedroom. Some people use different kinds of food for masturbation, but most people prefer the bedroom cuisine experience to be one that they share with their partner.

Toys used to be just for children, but there are many toys for adults out there, as well. Some people get
embarrassed about the idea of using sex toys, but they can be very enjoyable for both men and women.

Restraints like handcuffs are a common sex toy option, but there are many others. For women, the most common sex toys are probably vibrators and dildos. These are designed to give stimulation and many are modeled after the look and feel of a penis. If you want to enjoy something with your partner, there are also anal sex toys that are designed to be much more comfortable than using vaginal toys in that manner.

There are also ‘alone time’ toys for men, as well as penis extensions for a man who wants to give his partner a little more length or width, or for ‘being someone else’ during a role playing fantasy. If those aren’t enough, you can get cock rings, and these will prolong the length of an erection, letting your intimate time last longer. If you take good care of your sex toys they will last you a long time, so make sure you care for them correctly and that you buy good quality.

Know what they’re made out of and get what you like – not what you think you should buy based on the opinions of others.

Premature ejaculation is a serious and annoying medical problem, and it can be very upsetting and embarrassing for men who struggle with it. Not all women understand the issue, either, and that can lead to fights and arguments and hurt feelings about what happens – or doesn’t happen – in the bedroom. In an effort to avoid those kinds of things, be knowledgeable about premature ejaculation and use these tips to help avoid it. You need to be comfortable with your partner, but you can practice avoidance techniques on your own, as well. One of these is starting and stopping. When ejaculation is very close, stop and let your level of stimulation wane before starting up again. Do this three to five times per session. After a few weeks of practicing, you should last longer without the need to do this.

You can also wear condoms, as the stimulation is not as strong that way. Another option is to masturbate regularly, because you’ll be more comfortable with and used to the stimulation. You can also use sex toys to ‘build your immunity’ to pleasure and you can try the squeeze technique by wrapping thumb and finger around the penis when you’re close to ejaculation and squeezing firmly. You will hold back the response that way, especially if you squeeze the urethra, which runs along the underside.

Pleasure through sex is the most intimate thing that a man and a woman can share together. Sex as we know it is filled with excitement and satisfaction, but there are instances when sex isn’t as gratifying as we would like it to be. What exactly happens when sex does not turn out to be the amazing experience that we expect? Chances are, something went wrong in the different phases of the sexual process.

Like a road trip, achieving orgasm through intercourse requires a map. This will explain to you how one phase leads to another, and how disturbance in one phase may lead to failure to orgasm.

Phase One: Desire to Have Sex

Sex starts when the man and the woman start thinking of sex. Perhaps you have started kissing during your date, or have been exchanging sexual innuendos over the phone for a time now.

Sexual tension is present and has built to a point when it must be released. You may have avoided the sexual tension in the past, but now the opportunity to have sex and relieve that tension is available and you take it.

What goes wrong during this phase that causes failure to orgasm?

1. Orgasm failure happens when only one partner has sufficient desire to keep the sex going. Maybe your partner simply wants to sleep after a hard day at work, and won’t want to “waste” time making love.
2. Past failures to orgasm – A person who has always achieved orgasm through sex won’t see intercourse as a chore. Sex will be the reward that she gives herself after enduring a day full of mundane chores. The opposite happens when sex has always been “ordinary” to her; which means that she has always viewed sex as something that she has to do to give her partner pleasure, and not something that can give her an orgasm.

   The desire to have sex must be present and she must be eager to spend time under the sheets with you for sex to happen.

Phase Two: Excitement

In one word: foreplay! Women get excited with fondling and licking. Like men, they have hot buttons that must be pushed to get stimulated further. Knowing exactly how to fondle and kiss her pleasure centers will make her look forward to this phase of the sexual process. The amount of mental and physical stimulation you give her during this phase will determine the intensity of orgasm.

What goes wrong during this phase that leads to orgasm failure in the woman?

1. A man may get too cocky (or too excited) and go for his own pleasure without thinking of his partner’s. Some men get too motivated by their own orgasm to even consider the women’s. There are some men who simply manipulate the whole process of foreplay so that he can be gratified.
2. His technique sucks – Fingering or cunnilingus may be performed by anyone, but did you know that there are proper ways to do these? Maybe you have tried fingering a girl and she ended up dry and discontented (or even sore) after a while without even achieving climax? Eating a girl out also requires some special techniques that guarantee fast orgasm and more pleasure for her.

Great sex is a lot like eating a meal. Not just any meal, but a meal you have been raring to eat so badly that you are willing to drive a few miles to get to the only restaurant that sells it. This is not the first time that sex was compared to food. Both trigger a certain need, a certain desire that we want to satisfy.

In this article, we will compare lame sex to great sex using the food analogy. There are only two types of meals in the world: regular food that stops your hunger and those food stuffs that you’re craving to eat.

Lame Sex

Lame sex is like the ordinary meals that we eat on a daily basis. You know the “regular meals” quite well. They are available anywhere, and they only serve to satisfy our hunger for the time being. Sure, these types of food are mouthwatering to someone who’s hungry and they can definitely satisfy the appetite, but a person will not spend thousands in airfare or gas to get to a restaurant that serves this type of food.

Lame sex, like regular meals get old after a while. These don’t excite you anymore and you barely remember the last time you had it. These have become routine. You don’t crave for these and soon you will find yourself saying “this again?”

There’s a way of spicing up your sex life and turn lame sex into great sex; the same way as you would turn an ordinary meal into a fancy dinner. Now in the food analogy, you may add a sauce or some spices to the regular meals you eat and call it your “specialty”. You may even enroll in a cooking school to learn the best way to braise, fry, bake and sauté. You understand that to be good at something, like cooking or having sex, you must learn the unique techniques that will spell the difference between lame and great.

What is great sex?

How exactly does one quantify whether sex is great or not? Simply put, great sex is the type that always leads to orgasm in the man and the woman. Sex is always great when climax is achieved, because this is the pinnacle of pleasure that you and your partner can achieve once you start the process of sexual arousal.

You need to make women WANT to have sex with you, and you can only do that if you can get her to orgasm each and every time you have sex with her. This means putting her into an orgasmic trance, stimulating her enough to have her screaming (begging) for more.

Great sex will make her think of only the pleasure you are giving her. This means no mental distraction to take her mind off the pleasure.

If you can give your girlfriend or wife this kind of pleasure through sex each and every time you make love, then you are sure that she will crave for it like she craves her favorite dishes.